Having read several articles on narcissism, I keep trying to pinpoint what makes a narcissist worthy of the label. In my real life everyday experience, I found that narcissism is not always so cut and dry when it comes to identification.

I’ve tentatively concluded that this is a spectrum disorder and the point where narcissistic attributes regularly interferes with the happiness of loved ones or the quality of everyday relationships, is about the beginning stage in the attachment of such a label.

Because we live in “feeling” times when feeling good is paramount, regardless of the narrative adopted and the means of execution to feel a certain way — narcissism is the inevitable result of selfishness growing out of control. If the attainment of pleasure in whatever shape it happens to be eclipses the need for empathy, compassion and consideration for others, we have adopted a narcissistic mind set.

Narcissistic qualities is an unfortunate byproduct of a vain and attention -seeking mind which is kind of what the internet gravitates towards as far as getting eyeballs on our pulpit goes. We all have these qualities to one degree or another and often restrain ourselves when it becomes a pathological disruption to those that are close to us.

I’m aware of my own narcissistic tendencies and it can sometimes be a struggle to resist behaviour and actions that are characteristic of narcissists — especially when one is unaware of such behaviour being present. That is why self-awareness and honoring higher virtues is such a crucial combination to employ as a defense against these selfish behavioral mechanisms.

When we see others as a means to an end rather than to respect their autonomy and right of free will, we tend to introduce wounds to our characters. I also think that these wounds, however deep they are, can be cured and that narcissism is not an inexplicable psychiatric or genetic disorder in the way that therapists seem to suggest.

Just a few thoughts of mine that I felt compelled to share.